What is Love Bombing?
Love bombing is when someone overwhelms you with intense affection, attention, and promises early on. It feels amazing at first, but it's often used to create dependency before pulling back or showing controlling behavior.
This pattern is dangerous because it feels like genuine connection, but it's actually manipulation. Once you're hooked, they may start showing their true colors.
What It Looks Like
Here are common examples of love bombing:
Says "I love you" or talks about the future together within days or weeks of meeting.
Constantly texts, calls, and wants to be together, making you feel like the center of their world.
Gives excessive gifts or compliments, then uses that as leverage later: "After all I've done for you..."
Talks about moving in together, getting married, or having kids very early in the relationship.
Acts like you're perfect and can do no wrong, then suddenly criticizes everything about you.
How to Spot It
Too much too soon: Real connection builds gradually. If the intensity feels too much too soon, it might be love bombing, especially if it's followed by sudden withdrawal.
It feels overwhelming: Do you feel like you can't keep up with their level of intensity?
They use it as leverage: Later, do they bring up all they've done for you to get you to do something?
Sudden shift: After the intense beginning, do they suddenly become distant or critical?
What to Do About It
If you recognize love bombing:
- Slow things down: Real relationships develop over time. Don't rush into major commitments.
- Set boundaries: It's okay to say "This feels like a lot. Let's take things slower."
- Watch for patterns: Notice if the intensity is followed by withdrawal or controlling behavior.
- Trust your gut: If something feels off about the intensity, listen to that feeling.
- Get perspective: Talk to friends or family about whether the pace feels healthy.
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